Overwhelmed

It's been 112 years since I posted and that's mostly because I am Overwhelmed. I guess I must not handle stress well or so my husband says. I have had my fair share of stressful things happen to me in my life but I guess none of those have helped me to deal with it better.

Couple this with the fact that I live in a state with ZERO family or you know those life long type friends who will be there for you no matter what. Add that to the fact that my husband is at work exactly 1/2 of my life (no exaggeration). I am just in dire need of BREAK! The real kind...not just the run to the grocery store without the baby but be back in an hour kind.

I love my little man to pieces and I would repeat the whole infertility, loss, FML, pregnancy and horrible delivery 1000 times over for him. I would. But man....he is in a crabby stage here lately. He is crawling but only backwards which seems to really frustrate the crap out of him. I can totally understand how looking at something you really really want and then putting all your effort into getting it only to get farther and farther away from it would be TOTALLY UNCOOL. However, also uncool....screaming for your "mama" every 2 seconds ALL DAY LONG! I don't know what to do. The whole "mama" thing gets me everytime. How can I look at that sad little face calling my name and ignore it??

Add in the fact that I am pretty sure he is teething again. I know I am whining here. I would do it all again....1000 times over.

AHHHHHHHH....Ok. Vent over.

My baby will be 10 MONTHS old in 8 days. Can you believe it!? 10 MONTHS!! He truly is the love of my life and if I have to stay at home in Yoga pants getting fat for the next 17 years and 2 months then that is what I will do. Let's just hope it doesn't come to that!

Dreamland

I haven't been there..to Dreamland in at least 3 weeks now. Maybe longer...I really have lost track.

A few weeks ago we attempted a transfer of the weee little peanut18lb Six Month Old drool Monster into his OWN crib. I knew there would be hiccups. I did not know that 3 weeks later I would still be sleeping on a mattress on the nursery floor in 1 or 2 hour increments. Fail.

He was sleeping GREAT in his Bassinet in our room. He was getting up once around the 5-6 hour mark to eat and going RIGHT back down for another 4-5 hours. Life was good. and then that husband of mine kicked him out (for his own good he says). And with the baby...went me...because that baby...WONT sleep!

He goes down just fine but OH the NIGHT WAKING. The "brief awakenings" as they are called. They get him (and me) every damn time. We are working on changing things up during the day..more play...more solid food., better nap schedule in hopes that we can turn this boat around because it is headed straight for an ICEBERG.

In other news...I turned 29 which is the age I will be for the rest of my life ;-) It was pretty uneventful. I am watching a good friend's 2 month old twice a week so I had him and my husband stayed home from work. So it was just us and the babies. He made me breakfast, I opened presents and at dinner there was corned beef and cabbage and chocolate mousse...yummy!

I will leave you with a couple of pictures...

Love

Now this is love :-)



and this



The End. Happy Valentines Day!

Seriously Overdue

Soooo...in my last post I promised to update in just a few days. Major fail. Sorry.

Where to begin? I guess I should start with Christmas. It was pretty good. We don't live near any family so it was just us 3. Which was ok. We opened presents, ate dinner and relaxed most of the day.











In other updates....My baby is SO big. He doesn't seem like a baby anymore and that makes me really sad.



He still sleeps in our room..although I am not sure that its really for the best at this point. He is pretty noisy which means I am up a lot. I want to move him to his own bed because I want to do what's best for him and the longer I wait the harder it may be for him but I don't want to because I love him and he is my baby and I will miss him and he still eats once a night and I am too lazy to walk to his room. It's a conundrum.

Ry is playing all the time now. Playing while he eats, playing when he should be sleeping, playing by himself, playing with mommy and daddy. Just playing all the time. His smile makes me smile. I love him so much and even a tiny bit more when he is happy. Maybe that's wrong of me.



He found his feet a couple of days ago so that's the new favorite thing to do.



He is eating food! He loves it! The Pedi wanted us to start with orange veggies first since he has some tummy sensitivities so he has had sweet potato, carrots and squash. We start to introduce cereal in a week. Speaking of food...I decided to make my own baby food. I only want him to eat organic for now and it's really not easy to find in normal grocery stores in my area....believe it or not. So I am making it...except for carrots since there is some dilemma with nitrates. It's actually a lot easier to make then I had imagined. He likes it. It makes me feel good.

Things have been so busy but so fulfilling lately. I never knew how hard it was being a mom would be but I also never knew how rewarding it would be. I am so thankful for every minute.